me and maternity clothes don't mix

Does this picture look familiar? If you follow my blog at all, you will remember a recent post about Bennett and his "thing" with pants rolled up to his knees. This picture is not of him, sadly it is of me. "Why on earth would she be wearing pants that short, when she hates them like that" you ask yourself. Let me tell you why.

I hate maternity clothes for a number of reasons. The first reason is when you go buy them they are always located next to the plus size section of the store. This rubs me the wrong way. "Just because I'm big with child doesn't mean I am a plus size" I grumble to myself every time I walk by them. Why can't they place them next to the petites. Let me tell you that would make every pregnant woman feel a lot better about her expanding waistline, hipline and thighline. Sure we may be in denial about how many pounds we have gained and that it will all just drop right off when the baby comes, but you could throw us a bone, couldn't you?

Secondly, maternity clothes are expensive. They know they can rip you off because every pregnant woman needs them. I have such a hard time buying them because I only use them for 3 months max. And it is only the last eight weeks or so that I actually fill them out. It just seems like such a waste of money. I told Scott the other day I would rather wear my regular shirts, stretch the crap out of them and get new shirts after I deliver than buy maternity clothes.

So now I get to why I am wearing these wretched maternity jeans. I cannot fit into any of my regular pants anymore. The rubber band thing doesn't work. They don't make them long enough! For the past month I have been wearing the tight Shade shirts to keep my pants from falling off when I am in public. At home I am down to wearing two pairs of lovely exercise pants with red and blue stripes down the side and a pair of gray yoga pants. Essentially I am wearing pajamas night and day now. I told Scott it just doesn't seem right to change out of one pair of pajamas only to get into another pair to go to bed.

The tops are no better. For some reason they keep getting shorter and shorter and now sadly, this is what I look like during the day, though I think I do have a bit more hair.



About every week I will get fed up with the pajama look, pull out the box full of maternity clothes and see if there is anything I can wear that doesn't make me feel like I am wearing a mumu. And every time I pull them out, try them on and look at myself in the mirror I see the "mumu look" staring back at me. So I take them off, check to see if the size says "jumbo" and put the pajamas back on.

Today as I went to change from my night pajamas to my day pajamas I realized in horror that they were all dirty. I had no choice but to wear something maternity. As I dug in my box the only pair of pants (the rest are capris) that I could convince myself to put on were these. I don't know what state of mind I was in when I bought these, but they are clearly way too short. So now I am walking around the house with them on and every time I walk I can feel them flapping in the breeze. I am counting the minutes until the dryer rings.



And this is the little culprit right here. This little man is growing like crazy and so is my belly. He loves to alternate between swimming laps and doing the river dance when I am trying to sleep. The only thing that doesn't seem to be growing is my energy and speed. Is it all worth it? I wouldn't have it any other way. Hey little man, we are so excited to meet you. You've got some brothers that are in desperate need of another storm trooper and I do believe you are the perfect man for the job. See you soon.